This is for saturday,and my post timing and dates are wrong.

Today I work up kinda in a happy mood. Have not been emo for some time. Good right? Anyway,woke up late and went to watch my friend's band perform. His band name is Airtime and their drummer seriously sucks,I mean I drum better. haha. Actually the drummer is my friend so I give chance.

haha. bore-ed the rest of the day. Kinda happy in the night too.haha. Guess some of your know why.

I just don't like waiting,but I am waiting...

I really quite impatient,been waiting to see if I don't message,will she message me back...No luck so far,now its like 11.53am,and no luck so far. I think I suck. I want to talk to her,but can't do anything much. Falling for her,but I think I should widen my options,but I feel I am not sincere to her if I ever do that.
And now,its so boring...stupid maths...

somewhere over the rainbow lyrics

Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high
There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow, skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true!

Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me!

Somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow, why then oh why can't I?

( Someday I'll wish upon a star
and wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me! )

Somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow, why then oh why can't I?
If happy little bluebirds fly, beyond the rainbow
Why oh why can't I!

Its brand new for me

I like this girl,but she likes someone else. Am i good enough for her. I hope I am. Thats all I want to know. Cause I want to be the one she can hold on to... in everything.good and bad,happy and sad.

Today, I want to start blogging properly. My blog is not difficult to read,its just you need imagination. haha. Anyway,didn't go to school today. Was too tired,couldn't sleep well last night,cause I was emo-ing. Then spend time finding a new blogskin. Found one,this one. haha. Don't know why,but seem to like this song all of the sudden. Maybe this song is about, dreaming. Basically, what I do everyday is that. haha. My latest dream, trying to get her.
Anyway,went to school to do the stupid SAS cheer. Kinda piss off,cause I waited for the rest of the chiron members for like half an hour,at a damn ulu place. Man, and it piss me off that some events IG,keep complaining. Like Little girls. haha. Can't stand.
And I like always wait for her to message, sometimes so long, but nevermind,guess she is busy with her own matters. Anyway,use to liked a girl,that only message me,once before she sleeps. haha. so this girl is so much better. Kinda falling for her.


freedom my fallen...I'm gonna free myself

I'M WASTING MY TIME

I wish there was a happy ending,but I have a ending,I have to accept it. I need to learn be happy about it. Its like my life is empty,once I was filled near to the brim,but now I just hope to be filled again. I don't want her back,I can't,I won't. I do not love her anymore,I don't want to love her anymore,I don't need to love her anymore. I really don't have to. I choosed now at this point,no other things matter. I have choosen my path, my life is a chess game with everything. My life has been so fucked up before I choose,but I don't want to have a fucked up life forever. I am true and true different on my own. This is what I am accepting now,but I am always hoping I can find someone. But maybe she will come on later. Now its just a one man show. waiting for it to be a one man and one women love story. I am randomly lost.


if you can see me,my fallen,you will know why. you will know the end,and why I am there.

Queer! I made it this far

I have no power,I have failed.

Is it just me or was my life meant to be this way.I tried and it don't seem good enough. I am just trying to wear my hood,and cover myself away. I wanna just cover myself away from everyone,its like they won't miss me. Its good enough for me if I could live alone in Siberia. Maybe I can last another day. Just see my dreary legs stumble on. Further and further I go till you only see me as a shadow across the horizon,and then I fade.

I just came to tell you. Sweet and silent,long and lost. Goodbye my fallen.

Nothing last,if it did.Sorrow wouldn't be my guardian

I lay on my bed,but my swollen eyes are just watery.
If only yesterday could have been today. The moment her nick pop up,I was just so numb.In my mind I just taught was it possible,am I going die soon or something that you god grant my wish. Its just my heart skip and jump, then i click the msn pop up and saw her email add.
Argh!!!But it ended so fast. 9 months,then last then a solid 10 mins of talk.
Life is such a bad thing,I mean happiness then sadness.
Even today was happy,but then realise its nothing much and I go back sad again.

Now I'm feeling so much better



Talk to her finally after so long. I think I would be less emo now. Its finally the time to,maybe now it would be so much better. I need to set myself free,my wings are all restless. My weary search may be over. Needed this for so long, I feel like crying lor. So happy. Yet so damn sad.

I feel that the new pokeballs don't work that well

My pokeball sucks,I brought new ones.But WTH!!!! Can't pokeballs work properly. So now I want to buy ultraballs now.Hmm,I also brought death note at the $2 shop,but not working. Never buy things that cost $2 when they are suppose to cost $24.50. ERRRR!!! Then my Squall Leonheart ah,not even fighting properly.

So I want to take black and make it that

Here is my beating heart on my left hand,here is the dagger to stab my heart. I offer it to you,my fallen. Take it and stab it to your hearts content. Just remember I will come back heartless,no feelings,no pain. Its my destiny,its how it is suppose. I want go hide at a corner. Look at me,I want to have purple hair the covers the right side of my face.Like that guy in the pic.But he is a nobody and I seem to be one too,so ya I'm finding my somebody.To be real again.

If I die now...what I wish for...

Really its only a few things
1. To play the playstation 3 once
2.To see my homeland
3.To save someone's life
4.To let my family know I love them
5.Buy life insurance for myself,then my family can get the money(they need it)
6.Lastly,I just want her to know that I'm still that stupid fool that is in love with her,maybe the feeling is no more the same,but its still love.I think....

Ya,better buy the life insurance soon..

The world is dying,and so am I

The inconvenient truth is the world is on the verge of being a suana. How? what can we do,do simply things that we learn since primary school. SAVE THE WORLD,if not the future generation suffers.

Another inconvenient truth,I'm dying slowly. HAHA. My emo-ness is killing me,how am I to live long,my sorrow will take me someday. Its the truth,hope the planet goes on living when I die,cause the world can be save,I don't think I can. Time to say goodbye.

But who the hell cares if I fade

Don't worry I still have my new pokeballs.I will die with new balls in my hands. I have a new lie to tell,My life is a happy thing. haha. Use to be many years ago,but I lost myself along the way. I don't really know now.Love can fade away and kill you. But I'm just so god damn emo and stupid.ARGH!!!!!!!

My fallen,I miss you

The little things

I know that love is many things,great and terrible. Its a double-edged sword,but without it,its something that i guess could never do.


What if you like someone,but you're just scared. A feeling that you never felt for so long. why am I scared? I wanna know. Emo boy in a world of colours and these type of things sucks big time.

And another thing,if you are online and someone talks to you and you never reply cause lets say you are busy doing stuff or you are at canteen eating,then when you reply they go offline,and they don't read your reply. Then they got all childish saying that you don't reply their message. I mean sometimes you talk to that person they never even reply and I did it once and wanna complain.WAR!!!!!

I got Megatron,who the hell you got huh??? I also got optimus prime,and a lambo transformer ok... And I have new pokeballs,brought it at 7-11. Then I got the emo army k.wahaha.

please refrain from being too cautious,liking someone could lead to the greatest love your pitiful life could have since you know it.Seriously! Beauty is not skin deep,you should know this.

I have to admit I'm getting bored,lonely,emo.

In the little thing called a pokeball!

Today I realise what i've been missing.Pokeballs!!! Yes. Pokeballs. I realise that without getting new pokeballs,I have old pokeballs.And with old pokeballs,its efficiency drops. You know why Pikachu hates being in Ash's pokeball? cause he had old pokeballs,given by that sleezy professor oak,man that guy is weird.Is he opening his eyes or not? Yes pokeballs are important as the pokemon themselves,remember there are 493 pokemon to catch now,use ur balls well!

In something called 300

Spartans! HAWOO!!!! YES THATS ALL YOU PERSIANS.IF YOU WANT A FIGHT WE HAVE NEW POKEBALLS,DO YOU HAVE THE BALLS TO MATCH UP WITH THAT!!!! WAHAHA! NO YOUR DON'T,ALL YOU HAVE A PUSSIES!!! THOSE PERSIAN CATS OF YOURS CAN'T WIN OUR MEOWTH!

SO,prepare for trouble,make it 300,to protect the world from devastation, to unite all people within our nation,to denounce the evil of cats and balls,to extend our balls to the stars above, spartans and leonidas, TEAM 300! BLAST OFF AT THE SPEED OF LIGHT! SURENDER NOW OR PREPARE TO FIGHT! MEOWTHH THATS RIGHT!!! HAWOOO!! HAWOO!!!

It had something to do with the rainbow

It all has to end somewhere,deep in my heart. This is what I know,I can't just hold to fading part of my life. All I wish was,something that can never happen.

I dunno really what to do now,I dont even know if i should stop or move,run or hide.I just feel empty and wanting.Wanting for someone to give me directions. My eyes are close once in awhile,with outstretch arms,waiting for her hand to grab my hand. Let her voice just gently comfort me.But all are just empty dreams that don't mean much anymore,its significance is fading slowly but surely,and when it ends, I will be tenfold more lost then I am now.

It all begin with something that remain in my heart till now, 3 babies. Then it had to end.

I am so stupid. Just wish my Namani comes along,she will make me feel like a somebody even though I am a nobody.(Its kingdom hearts,although they are nobodies,they are just hollow living shells,their love made each other feel like a real human,with feelings and all) When she comes I hope I dun stupidly make a dumb mistake and let her go. I know she is waiting for me,and I know I've been counting stars to find her,but counting stars is not finding her,going out there to the world is. And I know she will be beautiful,cause beauty was never skin deep.

Why the rainbow? Its the sign of new hope. Its something that makes you feel happy when you look at it. A beautiful promise from GOD(Noah's ark,the earth flood for 40 days and nights,and when the water level resided,a rainbow was the sign that GOD promise Noah that the world will never flood again).Its just like the stars at night,but the stars shows us that there is light even in a world full of darkness.And don't diss GOD,he is my lord and redeemer,he is my king! Although I doubt him at times,I always return to his love.If only I could return to hers.So it something to do with the rainbow,show me all the colours,show me all the light.

You're not alone,there is more to this,you can make it out,you will live to tell.Let it play pretty for you.